Tuesday, February 28
i'm juz gonna say out my piece. no matter whether euu agree or disagree.
i feel tat it doesn't matter to euu whether i'm with euu or not.
euu are my only and i noe i can't live w/o euu.
from an outsider's view.. euu need miie badly.
but between us.. i think i need euu more badly.
euu always tink tat i took euu for granted..
but those hurtful words and those attitudes euu gave miie shows actually euu were the one hu took me for granted.
learned my lessons from a few relationships back.. i've found my weakness and flaws.
i'm juz too bad-tempered and hab no patience.
tats y i told myself...
1) MUZ control myself fer the next relationship(s).
2) NEVER EVER say break easily.
3) listen and follow only to MY heart but no one else.
and i manage to did it. and realli.. it gave miie a long lasting relationship which last fer almost a yr.
but y muz euu kip telling miie to go back to my ex(s) --- allen or even a person hu maybe admires miie but i hab no feelings towards him at all? --- kh.. john.. aaron.. marcius.. and nw charles.
did i ever ask euu to go back to amanda whom euu admire fer almost 3 yrs?
NO. i didn't. den y can't euu stop all tis nonsense which could hurt miie deeply?
euu dun lyk miie talking to my god-bros, john and marcius. saying tat i'm juz too close to dem.
okay. i reduced the no. of times talking to dem. even some times nort saying a sentence to dem fer the whole day. but y can't euu juz stop?
on the day we started our relationship.. euu said.. "my patience 4 euu is everlasting."
but where is ur patience nw?
whenever we talk.. i couldn't hear and i said 'HUR?'
and euu will say.. 'can euu stop saying hur? very irrating lorr.'
and i gort scolded again.
den when we r in opposite's shoes.. i said something and euu can't hear..
euu said.. 'HUR?'
i repeat everything once and again.
but in the end.. i gort scolded again fer talkin so softly.
can euu tell miie wot muz i do so tat euu wun scold miie?
during chinese new yr.. we played cards.. due to miie hi5-ing with aaron.. euu were so angry tat euu left the hse and smsed miie alot hurting words. i apologised.
but today. i saw euu hi5-ing with amanda.. but i kept quiet. (amanda.. its nort ur fault. i dun mean euu sae euu.)
i noe if i confronted euu. euu might say euu and her is oni frens. and will blame miie fer being unreasonable and sensitive again. tats y i choose nort to.
haiis. we started all tis relationship juz because of a sentence from euu.. "dun worry.. i understand."
and tis sentence make miie fall deep in love with euu.
althought it sound stupid. but ever min, hr, day, month we've been together gives miie more and more reasons to love euu.
but nw... things become tis way.. euu left miie all alone. all alone crying in a dark corner.
fer the one last time. i love euu.
i feel tat it doesn't matter to euu whether i'm with euu or not.
euu are my only and i noe i can't live w/o euu.
from an outsider's view.. euu need miie badly.
but between us.. i think i need euu more badly.
euu always tink tat i took euu for granted..
but those hurtful words and those attitudes euu gave miie shows actually euu were the one hu took me for granted.
learned my lessons from a few relationships back.. i've found my weakness and flaws.
i'm juz too bad-tempered and hab no patience.
tats y i told myself...
1) MUZ control myself fer the next relationship(s).
2) NEVER EVER say break easily.
3) listen and follow only to MY heart but no one else.
and i manage to did it. and realli.. it gave miie a long lasting relationship which last fer almost a yr.
but y muz euu kip telling miie to go back to my ex(s) --- allen or even a person hu maybe admires miie but i hab no feelings towards him at all? --- kh.. john.. aaron.. marcius.. and nw charles.
did i ever ask euu to go back to amanda whom euu admire fer almost 3 yrs?
NO. i didn't. den y can't euu stop all tis nonsense which could hurt miie deeply?
euu dun lyk miie talking to my god-bros, john and marcius. saying tat i'm juz too close to dem.
okay. i reduced the no. of times talking to dem. even some times nort saying a sentence to dem fer the whole day. but y can't euu juz stop?
on the day we started our relationship.. euu said.. "my patience 4 euu is everlasting."
but where is ur patience nw?
whenever we talk.. i couldn't hear and i said 'HUR?'
and euu will say.. 'can euu stop saying hur? very irrating lorr.'
and i gort scolded again.
den when we r in opposite's shoes.. i said something and euu can't hear..
euu said.. 'HUR?'
i repeat everything once and again.
but in the end.. i gort scolded again fer talkin so softly.
can euu tell miie wot muz i do so tat euu wun scold miie?
during chinese new yr.. we played cards.. due to miie hi5-ing with aaron.. euu were so angry tat euu left the hse and smsed miie alot hurting words. i apologised.
but today. i saw euu hi5-ing with amanda.. but i kept quiet. (amanda.. its nort ur fault. i dun mean euu sae euu.)
i noe if i confronted euu. euu might say euu and her is oni frens. and will blame miie fer being unreasonable and sensitive again. tats y i choose nort to.
haiis. we started all tis relationship juz because of a sentence from euu.. "dun worry.. i understand."
and tis sentence make miie fall deep in love with euu.
althought it sound stupid. but ever min, hr, day, month we've been together gives miie more and more reasons to love euu.
but nw... things become tis way.. euu left miie all alone. all alone crying in a dark corner.
fer the one last time. i love euu.
what we could have been, 2/28/2006 04:59:00 PM.
Sunday, February 26
actually blogging on feb 14 der. but he haben send miie those photos yet.
summore kinda busy tis few days.
went chalet last nite.
it was ZEN XIAO BOII's 21st birthday!!
happy birthday!! :))
abit bored down dere. maybe cuz i dun reali noe his frens? den sticking with my parents look silly. so i stayed with shiya and played some games.
abit dipsy after a few mouthful of wot-ever-alcoholic-combination.
i shld hab got myself REAL drunk.
maybe tat will make him concern miie more.
haiis. road isn't smooth tis few days.
UPS and DOWN makes miie depressed.
how i wish i could drink lots and lots of alcoholic drink and make miie DRUNK.
and maybe when i'm drunk i could sleep better. :))
haiis.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort flare up on miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort scolds miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort diao miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort ignore miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort get angry with miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat can let miie lean on during bus rides.
i wan tat howard lee tat LOVES miie lots lots.
i wan tat howard lee hu has lots and lots of patience with miie.
i wan tat howard lee hu treats miie as his one and only.
i wan tat howard lee tat treats miie as his small/cute lil baby.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort leave miie.
haiis.
cries.
summore kinda busy tis few days.
went chalet last nite.
it was ZEN XIAO BOII's 21st birthday!!
happy birthday!! :))
abit bored down dere. maybe cuz i dun reali noe his frens? den sticking with my parents look silly. so i stayed with shiya and played some games.
abit dipsy after a few mouthful of wot-ever-alcoholic-combination.
i shld hab got myself REAL drunk.
maybe tat will make him concern miie more.
haiis. road isn't smooth tis few days.
UPS and DOWN makes miie depressed.
how i wish i could drink lots and lots of alcoholic drink and make miie DRUNK.
and maybe when i'm drunk i could sleep better. :))
haiis.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort flare up on miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort scolds miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort diao miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort ignore miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort get angry with miie.
i wan tat howard lee tat can let miie lean on during bus rides.
i wan tat howard lee tat LOVES miie lots lots.
i wan tat howard lee hu has lots and lots of patience with miie.
i wan tat howard lee hu treats miie as his one and only.
i wan tat howard lee tat treats miie as his small/cute lil baby.
i wan tat howard lee tat does nort leave miie.
haiis.
cries.
what we could have been, 2/26/2006 01:13:00 AM.
Monday, February 13
dun even noe y i had a blog. i juz leave it to grow dust and bugs. LOL.
seen seniors taking results last friday. some were luffing but most were CRYING.
duhs. our skool didn't do well tis yr.
best student gort 6 fer Os.
wondering how come some ppl r juz SMART. nort lyk miie. STUPID. =x
i dun wan c myself crying next yr.
of cuz.. i wun aim fer good results lyk 6.
i juz wan an average.. maybe..
2 fer english.
2 fer chinese.
3-4 fer combined science.
1 fer maths.
3 fer combined humanities.
2 fer f&n.
which adds up to be 14-16?
LOL. it seems impossible.
i dun even hab time to revise at home. 24 hr a day is NOT enough!!
by the time i reach home.. i'll be attracted to the squarish things in my hse. (the com and TV)
and weekends will be occupied with tutionssssssss~~
can i get 14 fer Os if i dun study.
of cuz nort. :((
V-day is coming. i need cash to buy him something. and coicidentally, i'm so broke.
i tink i need a job but provided no one noes i'm working. =)
okay, i tink i'm talking crap. juz dun bother miie.
tinking of giving him a surprise.. but i dun tink i can make it.
i'm forever lousy. i juz can't make him happi.
tinking of tat day in bus with him, pingy and gurl. reali enjoyed it.
i luffed from da bottom of my heart.
althought euu were fooling ard, making miie look lyk a fool by doin funny stuns...
but i dun mind.
hearing euu luff and i enjoyed it...
y nort?
cuz i noe..
nobody gonna love miie better.
nobody gonna take miie higher.
euu noe how appriciate miie.
i muz stick with euu forever.
seen seniors taking results last friday. some were luffing but most were CRYING.
duhs. our skool didn't do well tis yr.
best student gort 6 fer Os.
wondering how come some ppl r juz SMART. nort lyk miie. STUPID. =x
i dun wan c myself crying next yr.
of cuz.. i wun aim fer good results lyk 6.
i juz wan an average.. maybe..
2 fer english.
2 fer chinese.
3-4 fer combined science.
1 fer maths.
3 fer combined humanities.
2 fer f&n.
which adds up to be 14-16?
LOL. it seems impossible.
i dun even hab time to revise at home. 24 hr a day is NOT enough!!
by the time i reach home.. i'll be attracted to the squarish things in my hse. (the com and TV)
and weekends will be occupied with tutionssssssss~~
can i get 14 fer Os if i dun study.
of cuz nort. :((
V-day is coming. i need cash to buy him something. and coicidentally, i'm so broke.
i tink i need a job but provided no one noes i'm working. =)
okay, i tink i'm talking crap. juz dun bother miie.
tinking of giving him a surprise.. but i dun tink i can make it.
i'm forever lousy. i juz can't make him happi.
tinking of tat day in bus with him, pingy and gurl. reali enjoyed it.
i luffed from da bottom of my heart.
althought euu were fooling ard, making miie look lyk a fool by doin funny stuns...
but i dun mind.
hearing euu luff and i enjoyed it...
y nort?
cuz i noe..
nobody gonna love miie better.
nobody gonna take miie higher.
euu noe how appriciate miie.
i muz stick with euu forever.
what we could have been, 2/13/2006 12:08:00 AM.
